Eighteen Years Ago Today

I was asleep when the first contractions started, about 4 am. I dozed for another hour since they were pretty far apart, then woke my husband. The baby was a couple days overdue so he'd made sure that his calendar at work was covered if he had to call in, but I could tell he was wishing the baby had waited just one more day. He called my parents who drove in from their home about 45 miles away to watch my son who was 2 years old at the time.

It was all over by 11:30 and we had a plump and perfect daughter. I blew out the capillaries in my eyes pushing and looked a bit demonic, but otherwise, I was fine and my little girl was too. It was a Friday and normally I would have checked out of the hospital the next day but my husband had a partners meeting at the law firm where he worked so I got to stay an extra day in bed with people fussing around me. I had visitors from the church, my siblings dropped by, later the nurses brought in a very nice meal for my husband and I. My sister came by and she, who wouldn't have her first child for another two years, announced that I had given birth to a Chinese red lizard. Yes, I come from a strange family.

Now, today, that 9lb. 13oz. baby is 18 (and weighs a reasonable amount for her height but don't think I'm gonna tell). She's sharing this milestone occasion with her boyfriend and best friend at the other end of the state. Although I miss getting to throw her a birthday party, I understand why she wants to be there instead of here. I documented one of my favorite parties, her 16th over on my other blog (now pretty much abandoned). Watching how people react to a sizeable group of teenagers all dressed up in formal wear in the middle of the afternoon, having a party at Taco Bell, is an experience to treasure. I'm glad I wrote about it so I can go wallow in nostalgia.

She'll be back for a few days over Thanksgiving and then she's off with boyfriend and her rental truck full of stuff to start her adult life. I am still debating about driving down as well. It's a loooong trip all alone, behind a truck, down the most boring highway in the world. And I know they'd probably rather not have me trailing behind all day. *sigh* If I do go it also means a stop in LA to see my dad and his new home. It will be very odd seeing him in a new place.

I won't see my daughter again until Christmas. I'm trying not to think about it since it's nearly too much to bear. This is the down side of having a nearly perfect relationship with her, if we were fighting all the time I would probably see this as a blessing, a chance for her to mellow out and for me to appreciate the good things about her from a distance, as I imagine my folks had to do (oh my, but I was a handful to raise). But noooooooooooooo (think Steve Martin - SNL in the 70's), she had to be the perfect kid...

I feel very fortunate that I went off to live in the dorms at a college when I was her age. I got to ease into the whole growing-up and being-responsible-thing much more gradually than she will. The college was a safety net of sorts - with its professors and counselors to help guide me, I managed to graduate. I also felt ready to be truly independent. I wasn't, but at least I felt that way.

Well, enough of this. AW is still out of commission and I'm jonesing for my fix. I've had a horrible headache all day (a combo of ibuprofen and Coke has helped) and I've managed to accomplish very little this weekend in the way of new writing or even research on markets. I have, however, done the laundry. I should get a medal. Or at least a sticker of one.

Thank goodness it's a short week next week. Busy on my days off, but that will help keep my mind off my miseries. Thanks for reading this far! I think tomorrow I'll find something interesting to write about that's not about me. Although I find myself fascinating, so who knows!

Dawno, parenting, emptynest